A VITAS Healthcare chaplain has developed a unique bereavement care program in the San Francisco Bay area.
Twice a month, VITAS Chaplain Jonah Sanderson convenes a group of 20 grieving family members for a Thai dinner at Thaibodia in Campbell, California. These “Death Over Thai Food” events are designed to foster peer-to-peer support, discussions about grief and a sense of community among the bereaved.
Sanderson developed the program and took it to the management team at his VITAS location, who quickly decided to support the dinners. The participants are family members who received spiritual counseling from Sanderson for periods ranging from one week to several years.
“Community and connection are what I believe to be the greatest antidote to the ill of our time — isolation and loneliness,” Sanderson told Hospice News in an email. “When an individual loses a loved one, they are forced into the community of the bereft. These dinners came about because together in communities of healing, loss can make sense.”
Founded in 1978, VITAS provides hospice and palliative care across 15 states and the District of Columbia. The Florida-based company has a total of 30 inpatient hospice centers and serves several counties in its home state. The company is a subsidiary of Chemed Corp. (NYSE: CHE).
The Death Over Dinner initiative inspired these events. That program emerged from the University of Washington in 2013. Through Death Over Dinner, people, not necessarily the bereaved, come together to discuss their end-of-life goals, wishes and perceptions. Sanderson tweaked the concept to focus on the grieving.
“My work has another central theme which is grassroots social action. By gathering people in Campbell, we are fulfilling a beautiful tradition of building small micro communities to help cope with depression, loss, faith, suicidal ideation and mental unrest,” Sanderson said. “It is also an extension of our mission at VITAS to support families throughout the hospice journey and the healing that follows.”
VITAS has plans to expand the program to 50 participants within the next year, up from 20 currently. Following that, they will raise the benchmark to 100 bereaved family members.
Also part of the program is an aspect called “Bereavement Buddies,” which pairs members in various stages of grief to provide mutual support. This has resulted in the formation of friendships among participants that extend beyond the Death Over Thai Food events.
“Bereavement buddies is a mentor-mentee relationship built on the belief that healing is strengthened through connection and the power two people can have when they sit together unpacking their pain and sharing commonalities,” Sanderson said. “Lives are changed and elevated.”
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